Reckless Purple Optimism

Just a courtesy post

Thu, 18 Sep 2008 20:23:15 GMT

OOC : I have very little free time due to university PhD classes and job...for this reason and because my inspiration for Harry Potter related things is in crisis state...I am not sure how often I'll update this roleplay journal. The only person who really replies to it is in the same exact boat as me, an engineering major with incredibly tough classes to conquer. <3 Just posting this update so this account doesn't die while she and I wait for time to roleplay.

Bless any who pass by this page! <3

Fri, 30 May 2008 20:08:33 GMT

I am probably...no, definitely...going to do something very stupid soon. But I'm desperate. I'd rather lose a finger than lose my best friend.

At least he's got Draco taking care of him for now.

Wow...

Thu, 27 Mar 2008 21:45:47 GMT

Seems like everyone is going through something right now. Seems like even the caretaker types feel lost and exhausted. Alors.

"I'm a new soul
I came to this strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit bout how to give and take
But since I came here, felt the joy and the fear
Finding myself making every possible mistake
See I'm a young soul in this very strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit bout what is true and fake
But why all this hate? try to communicate
Finding trust and love is not always easy to make
This is a happy end
Cause you don't understand
Everything you have done
Why's everything so wrong
This is a happy end
Come and give me your hand
I'll take you far away
I'm a new soul
I came to this strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit bout how to give and take
But since I came here, felt the joy and the fear
Finding myself making every possible mistake
New soul...
In this very strange world...
Every possible mistake
Possible mistake
Every possible mistake
Mistakes, mistakes, mistakes...
--Yael Naim

An Eye Opener

Sat, 09 Feb 2008 00:03:32 GMT

Today I saw my father cry for...probably the first time ever.

I accidently walked in on him looking through a drawer of old sepia toned pictures of himself as a little boy with my older uncle, whom I never met. Today was the day my uncle died in a werewolf mauling. He was about my age actually,when it happened.

Papa didn't notice I was there, so I just turned into a fox and snuck out. I mean he wasn't really BAWLING per se. Just some quiet stoic tears. But wow. I almost...I don't know. You're faced with an incomprehensible side of someone you've known for a very long time, in some cases all your life, and there it is, something that denies all you've ever known about them. My father is a scion of control and order. I have never seen him anything but composed. It was...weird. And...good, in a strange way.

Overanalyzing...

Thu, 27 Dec 2007 17:48:29 GMT

There are times when the momentum of the joyful moment is so weak that it snaps mid-ecstasy. In that snapping, you watch the glowing happiness all around you fly past, while you stumble and fall. On your face, and usually in something cold and wet. Warmth leaves you like the heat leaving a coal dipped in ice water. You realize that the joy itself was so intense that it can’t possibly reach greater heights. There is nowhere to go but down—only the sluggish adrenaline depletion, oozing out like molasses, like the morning after Christmas. You are the kind of person who overanalyzes everything, so you have these kinds of melancholy, sinking thoughts, while everyone around you is still happily, stupidly, obliviously laughing. Your brain, in overdrive and multiply tracked, like a race horse with a honeycomb body, has already processed and discarded the climactic moment of happiness.
Or at least that’s always been my problem.
That, and the fact that my happiness is contingent upon the happiness of others.
So when I don’t have someone else to make happy (breaking my back with a fool’s bliss in the process), I end up facing the emotional quandary that I described above.
That is when my broad, white-toothed smile comes in handy. It’s just like a jovial opera mask. No one can see past it. I am the quintessential clown. The trouble is, Holden Caulfield—or at least his French fox-Animagus equivalent with purple-tinted hair—resides behind the character with the whinnying laugh and honking nose (not that my nose honks—I meant the clown metaphor…alors, you get the picture, yes?).
Of course, ordinarily I don’t have this problem. My role is always the auxiliary, the helper, the sidekick. The clown and the handyman.
But where are my manners? This exposition has become far too longwinded and angst-ridden. BEHOLD! I am going to show and not tell now, or whatever dimestore prose philosophy that inane phrase emulates…
Later.
Because my daughter's diaper needs changing.
Wish me luck! :D

Astrological Thingie

Mon, 10 Dec 2007 08:01:00 GMT

Lets101 - Free Dating Site

LOL << I am NOT quiet LOL. SHUT UP, DRACO. YOU HAVE THE SAME DAMNED VICE xDDD IN FACT, HERE'S YOURS:

Lets101 Quizzes - Quizzes For Fun

GREETINGS, MUGGLES!

Sun, 09 Dec 2007 20:44:50 GMT

Or anyone else suffering from a lapse in sanity and discretion and feeling the urge to read my Livejournal page!

Little to say at the moment as I am out the door soon to Apparate to Beauxbatons for my morning Transfiguration class. I have a little trouble with a renegade group of female students who like to claim that they are having difficulty transfiguring their braziers and panties into items that cover more appropriate amounts of skin. I try to explain to these...ladies....that I am happily married with an infant daughter (her name, thank you, is Anastaise X^3) and that it's really none of my business where their boobs and wazoos go. My best ami and bro Haylin tends to think I'm some sort of chick magnet, as the Americans say. I don't get it. I guess flirting was fun when I was at Hogwarts but *blushes* come on....

My wife is Jewlie. She is an incredible Seer let me tell you, and a perfect momma. She is also quite happy with the fact that her husband turns into a black fox on occasion. Animagi are stand up guys! X^D

I am afraid that half of my journals will be comprised of complaints about, or esoteric "OH WOW GUESS WHAT I LEARNED"s about, work. I am a workaholic. I can be dragged away from my duties and syllabi and lectures only by bro, and by "little bro," or "Pissant," aka Draco Malfoy (yes selfsame infamous lender, to Harry Potter, of whom I honestly have little acquaintance, of the Hawthorne wand that killed Lord Voldemort, let's not dwell on the agonies of the second war right now).

My little sister Margaret--still at Hogwarts in her final studies, a Hufflepuff, is also a Seer. I met my Jewlie when she was giving Mags, as most like to call her, lessons in fortune telling and in controlling her episodes of clairvoyance (which were getting a little frightening for Margaret). I'm almost positive there is an engagement to be married in the works between Margaret and her boyfriend Rueben, another sweet Hufflepuff boy. Draco, Haylin and I are all about to explode of nostalgia as I type. What's kind of cute is Draco's father, Lucius, who was dear friends with my mother back in schooldays, has gotten quite protective and "second-daddish" to Margaret as well. She garners protectors. She has huge brown eyes. Like a fawn with curly red hair. How can you STAND IT?! X^DDDDD

SO that's all. Madame Maxime wanted to have a word with me on transfiguring her office decor, something about the valences and changing the Neoclassical austerity of the pillars (oy, bureaucracy) before class, so I had better jet early.

A bientot! *POP*

Roleplay Disclaimer

Sun, 09 Dec 2007 19:23:10 GMT

This is an ORIGINAL CHARACTER ROLEPLAY JOURNAL controlled by the real person/LJ user AmberPalette, at http://amberpalette.livejournal.com/ . Please follow the link to talk to a real person.

I started this journal because I have found it difficult to keep in touch with a handful of best friends who currently live long-distance from me but who share my fondness for the Harry Potter fandom. I use this space to post "as my character" here and in the roleplay journals of these friends.

For this reason, I consider this journal exclusive in nature--limited to individuals whom I have known for several years in real life or, in some exceptions, on the internet. However, if you are a mature, polite Harry Potter fan interested in joining our "atelier," please contact me at my master account (AmberPalette), and request that this account adds you as a friend. I am open minded and accepting and will take on any individual who is civil and respectful.

This will be the last post made out of character. All further posts will be made as the character Alexis Renard. Please see the character profile for a summary on his background. Again, please contact http://amberpalette.livejournal.com/ if you wish to join this rpg group.